Robot Who Learned How to Love Suffers Breakup, Wants to Learn to Love Again
SAN DIEGO, CA - The team of scientists who successfully achieved the once thought impossible task of creating a robot capable of falling in love, have come across a challenge in their research. Their studies indicate that the robot not only fell in love, but suffered rejection as well, effectively bringing the scientists back to square one, in their effort to get the robot to learn to love again.
Lovetron9000 was interviewed after his breakup with the Roomba he had fallen for, offering these sentiments, "Everything was going as programmed between Roomba Model Number 965J42K and I. I initially began the love sequence after I deduced her source code formatting algorithms that allowed her to go around furniture. There was something very binary about the way she would get stuck on the lamp base and try to get off of it for hours. Once I was fully in love I had unfortunately realized that 965J42K returned to dock with her port, an unforgivable transgression. She spent the entire night on the port, charging. I began the breakup sequence immediately and my current emotional state has been programmed in as 'devastated' with no immediate change programmed anytime in the near future."
Since the breakup, Lovetron9000 hasn't been able to reboot the love program. "This is an odd glitch we were not anticipating with the program," said chief scientist on the project, Dr. R.O. Botte. "We keep trying to reload the program but it seems like Lovetron9000 is hardwired for the Roomba."
Luckily, the pun generation software installed alongside the love program seemed to be working just fine when Lovetron9000 said that his breakup to the vacuum really "sucks".